I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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