It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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