Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
