he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
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