Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
