i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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