Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
