If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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