Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
