i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
