i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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