You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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