I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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