I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
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