it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
