One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
