I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
