I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
