how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
