I want to stick my p in your. b.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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