Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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