we're blogging at a bar
I want to stick my p in your. b.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
