I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
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