i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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