You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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