Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
if only i could text you this smell
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i love accidental penises.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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