Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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