Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
