he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Randomize