is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
