You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
