drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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