Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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