Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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