Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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