I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
