The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
