Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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