It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
even my farts smell like vagina
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
