are you so shy because you have an std?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
