Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Is it because I queefed?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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