alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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