we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
