what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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