you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
It all started with a game of naked twister.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
