I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Randomize
