I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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