Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize
