where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
