We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Randomize
